Sales Savvy

I liken reconnecting with old friends on a social media site to a high school or college reunion. Some of us have changed, some stayed the same, some became less interesting over the years and others became intriguing. But social etiquette applies in the same way it would at a reunion or cocktail party, perhaps more so when you have a history with these people. Just to reinforce this point, the reference is a cocktail party as opposed to a frat party…

1. If an update on your vegetable garden is all you have to talk about,  make stuff up (just kidding…???). I’d like to say I made that up but I have a friend who can give you daily updates on a very robust vegetable garden in the Northwest…and no, his friend is not a farmer. 
2. Do share milestones and important details of life: first steps, first day of school, vacations, weddings, graduations, Ph.Ds., anniversaries, home town news, and yes, even deaths or illnesses.
3. Frequent updates on your political or personal agenda(s) are grounds for de-friending. People and viewpoints change over time… There’s a fine line between sharing what’s important to you and trying to convert people across political lines—you want to stick with the former without being offensive or trite.
4. If the health details you wish to share are the same things you would tell a doctor—TMI! That said, one of my friends broke her ankle and uploaded a picture, I gotta that say it certainly earned our sympathy. But she had a good story attached to it, it wasn’t gory  photo and she has more to share than a bad ankle.
5. Some photos—and stories–are not meant to be shared, even if they occurred 5, 10, 15 or 20+ hours, days, weeks or years ago.  I have a good friend who discovered that her sorority sister kept a pretty good catalog of college photos—while in her case they are all benign, I’m not sure that everyone needs to see you in dolphin shorts, sporting big hair, or the punk rock stage…especially if your social media friends include past or present co-workers.
6. DO share meaningful photos or memories with your friends. I have a childhood friend who sent me a recent picture of his mom standing in front of the house I grew up in. That was a really touching moment on two counts—to see his mom and to see my childhood home.
7. Invitation overload—(I.e. games and quizzes). Honestly, I’m not really interested in knowing what type of automobile, color, flower, cartoon character, dog or zoo animal you are most like…but more importantly, I don’t need to know what type of flower, zoo animal or color I am most like…BUT if you are under the age of 18, I’ll play along. As a recipient, invitation overload can make you feel like you’re snubbing a friend when in reality you just aren’t that interested in knowing what type of Picasso painting you might be.
8. If your name is Bartlett, then quote all you want. But if I truly wanted to know what fabulous thoughts Nietzsche or Thoreau had for each and every day, I would add them as friends—and that would be tough to do. Talk about what’s important to you so people will get to know who you are today and feel free to put a little humor into your updates as well (as some things don’t change!)
9. Don’t take it personally if everyone doesn’t have the same level of participation.
10. We’re not always as interesting as we think we are—Don’t spam your followers and friends with hourly updates–or it’s time to put the phone or computer away and have a live conversation with somebody…
11. You don’t need to connect with everyone…