I started thinking about the people I have worked with over the years. I am lucky enough to have a network of colleagues and friends who are candid, caring and funny. This led me down the path of remembering some of the funnier bits of advice, insight and exchanges that have occurred throughout my career.
While this particular blog is intended to be light in tone, the truth about personal advisors and work confidantes is that they are a necessary part of your personal success. These are people who have your best interests at heart, and that means they don’t always agree with you. It is easy to take work and ourselves too seriously, so if you’re lucky, they offer perspective, refuge, laughter and lightness.
Keywords (who said what to whom):
- SETM: Someone else to me
- MTSE: Me to someone else
10. SETM: You do realize that it takes longer to ask these questions than it takes to answer them? (In response to our first time using Behavioral Interview questions—which were quickly shortened).
9. SETM: My former boss was so bad we called him Osama Bin (insert last name here). (This moniker is now the gold standard for all “terrorist” bosses).
8. MTSE: I think most of my team is less than pleased with me right now (several of them were on performance improvement plans).
SETM: That’s okay, “bitch” is in.
7. SETM: I think one of your employees is going to have a problem with you, he said you’re an “unknown quantity”.
MTSE: What does that mean?
SETM: It means you’re a woman and he hasn’t worked for one before.
MTSE: Well, I’m going to be a known quantity soon enough.
6. MTSE: You are every company’s dream. Your face says so much that you can actually get your under-performers to quit without saying a word.
5. SETM: Were you wearing your manager’s hat? (Advice regarding a non-work related conversation…).
4. SETM: I was told I was too short but I’m not sure how I can use that constructively to prepare for my next interview.
3. SETM: Was it my imagination or did he say “convalutin”?
2. MTSE: I actually feel harassed after taking that class. (The trainer for our sexual harassment training was a little too descriptive).
1. MTSE: Was that a toilet flushing during the conference call?
SETM (Editor of magazine, in fact, where I was Publisher and just starting with my first word-processor – we were all offline once upon a time, remember! And he was watching me navigating along a line of text with the directional arrows, one character at a time.)
“Oh lord, we’ll have to teach you where the “End” key is”
Might turn into a prayer, if this mayhem carries on much longer I thought
Neil Warren,
Owner & Publisher – ModernSelling.com
How’s this for “not the right way to cold call” from my very first sales job…my team leader walks into small commercial premises accompanied by me the rookie…gatekeeper says “Can’t you read the sign?” pointing to a large sign saying “no hawkers allowed”…team leader replies “no it was covered by the sign saying warning, fat cow behind front desk”!!!
After picking my jaw up off the floor I ran outside!!
Sales Manager Australia New Zealand at Editure